"We are going to Loftus"

This be the battle cry of Wolverine and the Village idiot and will be up to the day of the final and remember you heard it here first “The Cheetahs will beat the Bulls at Loftus on the 31st of October 2009”

So what you all been up to this week? “Won the lotto, found a new friend, Partied till you collapsed or watched re-runs of 7de Laan” My week was Ok’ish, no fireworks but not to bad.

Braai season is upon us we have been to 3 Braai’s this week Thursday was at Andre and Annetjies, Friday at our place and Saturday at Werners and that was an awesome partaaaaay, lots of Lekker locals so if you didn’t crack an invite then you missed out big time, Dop and a Chop is awesome, “Me like it a lot”. On the OFM Mumbo Jumbo Blog I read a newspaper article that the SA government is going to legislate Braai fires “yes you heard right” to reduce carbon emissions Wood and Charcoal Braai fires will be regulated by having us Tax payers pay R80 00 for a 3 month permit or R10 00 for a one of permit, the permits you will be able to buy at the local Post office “what happens if they are on strike” or if its after 4 and you and your mates decide to have an impromptu Braai”? the fines for illegal Braai fires will be R500 per incident and will be policed by the “Green Scorpions” an offshoot of the Department of environmental and tourism affairs. If its true, as I have my suspicions it’s a hoax, how will they police this, who came up with this idea and what next to tax us whiteys “a fart meter in the toilet”? (Go to http://www.ofm.co.za/ and then click on the Mumbo Jumbo Blog for the article about the braai fires)

Marquad had their Makietie this Saturday, Wolverine and I were unfortunately not able to make it due to previous commitments “root canal, and laser tattoo removal treatment” I am sure however the 25 tourists enjoyed themselves thoroughly, YES I am still the Moer in that Clarens did not win the Tourism village of the year and will be for a long time to come. Wolverine in fact paid a visit on Tuesday and he said it was nothing to write home about (he did not even take photos) only amusing item he saw was an old concrete dam at the towns entrance that had “Marquad is a dam fine place” spray painted on it. Well Marquard may be dam fine But Clarens is the undisputed destination of choice for visitors to this fine Province and we have a proper dam at our entrance, not a cement one. “Yep still the moer in”

Bokpoort had a Beerfest this Saturday and I had to go and assist Wolverine who decided to see what would happen if the chain came off and he was travelling along a dirt road at speed, well he is ok,” nothing that a bit of skin grafting wont fix”, had a couple of beers with me mate and then headed back home, Methinks the Wolverine decided to partake of the delights that were on offer at Bokpoort instead of braaing
with his mates.

So Pareira is coming back to coach Bafana Bafana, I just find it amusing we paid him a fortune for the few months he was here, we paid him to go back home ( and was it not him that suggested Santana as a replacement coach, well if it was cannot be happy with his decision making process). Why not use a local coach? What is the fixation with African teams having to Play Brazilian style football, We play African style football, we wait for the ball to get to us, hoof it down the park and hopefully someone called “Sypho” kicks it in the net. To be honest I don’t see anyone turning Bafana Bafana around and if we win one match in the World Cup that will be a miracle. So good luck Pareira and enjoy the Millions you will be earning every month.

The Clarens Intermediate cricket team had another match on Monday and this time they played a good school, Must say we did not disgrace ourselves with the coach of the other school complimenting Mark and I on the teams performance, “not bad for a couple of part time coaches” We lost but put on a good fielding display, we have to work on the batting as we have no depth, but this I am sure mark will work on next year. I think we may also have made history with letting Rea play in the game; Rea is a young lady that comes to the practices and has shown commitment. I think that it was a great thing to see the other team clap he from the field when she was bowled for 1 run. Both Mark and I as well the headmistress Annetjie are very proud of her, unfortunately we did not have a camera with us to record this auspicious occasion.

The Village idiot Blog is now being used by overseas persons, I received an e-mail from a lady who was Googling Clarens and came across my site, the lady wanted to know about schools in the area: “First Clarens, then the World”

No rugby this weekend but Valentino Rossi did become World champ today, Natalie and Stefan from the Clarens Brewery were particularly happy as they are big fans of the “Doctor” so he has won the 125 cc world championship, the 250 cc World championship and the 500 cc world championship 7 times.

Seems that a poll was taken in the Godd old U S of A and 75% of them don’t believe in Global warming and this from the country that gave us AL Gore and An inconvenient truth. Imagine if Al had not made that movie, then 100% of Yanks would not believe in the Ice caps meting etc: as my good friend Walter would say “Dumb Asses”

Sad news of the week was the passing of a long time resident Brigadier General Rob Crowther, Oom Rob’s service was held on Wednesday at the NG Kerk and the church was packed with locals as well as friends and family from further a field.

I always love it when I read stuff like this as the British press is always quick to point out other counties problems, especially South Africa. I Received this from a friend, and here I thought England was a Utopia, free medical care, great variety of jobs with great salaries (12 -1), the dole (should you not want a fantastic job), Glorious weather with sunshine at least 4 times a year and of course the biggie that all who flock to the island will tell you CRIME FREE, “Oops seems all those Sefricans flocking there and love it so much just perhaps where wrong”

London - "British police say permanently armed officers are patrolling crime-blighted London neighbourhoods, a major change in UK law enforcement. (“My God armed police in the UK, this cannot be, this must be a joke, England is SOOOOOOOOOOO safe”) London's police department said on Friday that a new unit was operating in a district of north London driven by gun battles between rival drug gangs and other areas that have suffered a wave of gangland shootings. British police have never routinely carried firearms on patrol. Guns are usually handled only by dedicated teams of police marksmen. Chief Inspector Neil Sharman said the new unit would allow London police to take "a more proactive approach to deal with weapons on our streets." Some lawmakers have however criticised the change, saying the tactic could exacerbate the use of firearms by criminals.

My wife was doing extra Afrikaans lessons with Gabby this week and they both burst into fits of laughter it seems that Gabby, instead of say “Ek wil n koek bak” said “Ek wil n boek kak” J

Now we may not like the Aussie’s due to the Cricket and Rugby rivalry, but this is just typical Aussie AND THIS GUY NEEDS A MEDAL

T. B. Bechtel, a City Councillor from Newcastle, Australia, was askedon a local live radio talk show, just what he thought about theallegations of torture of suspected terrorists.

His reply prompted his ejection from the studio, but to thunderousapplause from the audience. HIS STATEMENT: 'If hooking up one rag head terrorist prisoner's testicles to a carbattery to get the truth out of the lying little camel shagger will savejust one Australian life, then I have only three things to say,' 'Red is positive, Black is negative, and Make sure his nuts are wet.'

Another e-mail sent to me was this one that was published in a Nigerian newspaper recently, makes for very interesting reading.

South African experience

SIR: On Thursday October 1, 2009, the National Chairman of our great party Chief Bisi Akande; the Lagos State Chairman of the Party in Lagos, Chief Dele Ajomale; his wife; the representative of the Governor and my humble self left for South Africa to inaugurate the chapter of our party. Business finished on Saturday October 2 and 3, 2009 in both Pretoria and Johannesburg. We had Sunday October 4 to look around. It was my first visit to South Africa and what I saw stunned me.

Am I in Africa or Europe? Am I in America? Is this another Singapore? Could this be true? Where was Nigeria when South Africa was putting all these structures in place? If the white man did all these in South Africa why were the Nelson Mandelas of this world complaining? If South Africans got their independence on a platter of gold the way Nigeria got hers in 1960, would there have been all these structures I am seeing here today? Impossible! From what I saw on ground in South Africa, it looked as if all the companies and industries all over the world are physically present there. Ah! Nigeria has been left behind. South Africa is the potential and undisputable leader in Africa. Thanks to the white South Africans.

I came to the unhappy conclusion that the mosquitoes that drove the whites away from Nigeria in 1960 did a colossal and unmitigated damage to Nigerians. I again asked myself these questions: How many black Africans did the whites kill before surrendering power to them? How many Nigerians have been killed by Nigerian leaders since they took over power from the whites in 1960? Let us compare the figures. I am sure the supreme prize South Africans paid to have the South Africa I see today will be so infinitesimal compared with what our leaders have killed to remain in power in Nigeria.

What I am saying is that God should have allowed the whites to tarry for at least more 30 years in Nigeria and we would have been better for it. Mandela survived 27 years in prison because the white man was a better person. He could not have survived 10 years in prison in Nigeria.
My conclusion after seeing what I saw in South Africa is that the whites left Nigeria in a hurry, and that is why we are suffering today. Had the whites tarried in Nigeria, Nigeria would have been like South Africa today. I want the whites back in Nigeria!
Joe Igbokwe,Lagos.
Saying of the week comes from Wolverine who was hungry and then given a pizza to eat “This is going to go down like a homesick mole” here are a couple more.

· Is a chicken crossing the road poultry in motion?
· If you don't pay your exorcist, do you get repossessed ?
· Will a grenade thrown into a kitchen in France result in Linoleum Blownapart ?

Have a great week and dont forget Shout CHEETAHS on SATURDAY the 31st otherwise Wolverine and I will come and visit you.


The Village Idiot

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